While I'm stuck in the middle of my book, I reflect what the new year brought us.
Heartbreak, misery, and shock.
But just because your life sucks doesn't mean you should give up.
It means you have something to say.
The world hurts and our words are supposed to heal it.
What about healing the writer?
Can our own words soothe us or do we selflessly reveal our souls to help others find their own?
Misery wants to empathize.
We want to relate.
(Yes, this is a happy photo I took. There have been no gloomy days here so I've been extra cranky. I need my gloom or all the happy irks me. Balance, people. Works both ways.)
1. Brings Value 2. Makes You Relatable 3. Strong Emotions Produce Best Results 4. Therapy for Writer and Reader
Which writer did you relate to who had horrible experiences? Maybe you didn't relate, maybe you just felt their work was beautiful. One of my favorites is Edgar Allan Poe. If anyone read his work, they have at least one favorite. With my disturbing perspective of what's beautiful, his violent poetry speaks to me. It's dark but it's honest. He lost so many in his real life that his only outlet was writing.
Now what if he lived a happy life? Annabel Lee would not have the same impact.
When darkness veils your life, it's an opportunity to create. When Alan Rickman died, my soul broke. Didn't want to do anything that day. I got drunk and cried. My years of drawing fan art, writing fan fics, and watching his films three-fourths of my life led to a very miserable week. After I sobered up his day of death, I painted. I had to. The brushstrokes were therapeutic. I didn't hurry it up to post my tribute with everyone else, I just painted for my soul's sake. 21+ hours later, I submitted my tribute on my art page. For miserable reasons, it ended up being my best work yet. I handled every detail with perfection (as much as I could). This is one version:
Didn't sleep. Didn't eat much. Even stopped drinking. Cried a lot watching my painting become him. Skipped the Bargaining stage. Disbelief, Anger, and Sadness mostly. I shouldn't use my emotions to work, but sometimes I need to. It produces the best results. If I didn't find a way to channel my emotions, I would've kept drinking. Not good for anyone who depends on me.
Another way I coped with tragedy came more immediate, years back when my dog died. I never got serious about writing until his death. I had to write. I promised him.
It still hurts.
My first book leaks my loss of the greatest friend ever. People will find solace in their loss through acceptance of death. That's my hope, anyway. Nobody should deal with that alone.
Our darkness is what gives us value. Without miserable moments, we can't be relatable. Total misery is doom but if we find the balance to accept the light and dark, then we can find the words to make writing worth reading. I'm not saying be miserable all the time. Not saying be happy all the time either (ugh...that's the worst...so fake...hate fake, all-happy people). But we can't help what happens to us. We can help what we do about it.
John Berryman Virginia Woolf Edgar Allan Poe Tennessee Williams Hunter S. Thompson Ernest Hemingway Robert E Howard Anne Sexton Sylvia Plath
And again, not saying misery is a good thing or that we should glorify it, but successful writers had awful lives. Certain all these committed suicide. If you think your life sucks and are not talking to someone about it, don't keep it in. Seek the light. Sometimes writing won't be enough to soothe your ache. I want you to find hope. Every aspect of your life is meaningful, even the misery. But if it hurts too much, please--please--don't keep it to yourself. Those stages to suicide are bullshit. My friend died and no one saw it coming. Wanna talk? I'm here. Seriously.
This post is a mess. No apologies. Talking about misery where spots are still sore is not my favorite, but I have to, especially if it helps you.
First thing I hear about rewarding yourself includes food. Buy an extra sugary coffee, go splurge on ice cream. I treat all my reward systems like I treat my fitness one: the healthy, non-detrimental way. Certain foods may not have the same effect on you as it does me, but if I carb load or have one too many sugar yums I am in a coma or just the laziest person ever. If I start writing again after I rewarded myself with sugary snack, I will fall asleep with my hands on the keyboard, and nothing further accomplished.
How should we reward ourselves? Rewards should improve our state of mind, alleviate stress, and I know you're thinking "sugar alleviates stress and improves my state of mind", or "beer alleviates..." "chocolate improves..." and I say, you will use it as a crutch and it will break, and drown you. I know. I've been there. Using food as a reward leads to more food and more food and--oh look at that, I will have gained back every pound I ever fought hard to get rid of since I started my weight loss journey back in 2011. Yes, people. I'm bringing this up because I used to be fat and I will not be fat again. I hated how I felt and food reward systems are dumb. All food reward systems will lead me back to how I was. If you are working tirelessly to lose weight, maintain it, or just be healthy--maybe you're starting your nutritional awareness and want to find other means of rewards--this is the list to inspire you to not pick up that donut because you just sat there for hours upon hours and met your word count goals.
New Book or Journal
Staycation
Venture Out
Exploit Capitalism
Hire Loved One as Servant for a Day
1. New Book or Journal
Every writer loves paper. Every writer should be reading books to absorb the finished product of other writers, either as entertainment, or to be inspired, or as personal development. I call it personal development because, truly, I don't like reading. Why do I not like reading? Because I love reading and I am constantly bombarded by crappy books, or at least crappy starts. (I will prey forever on the gnawed bones of Veronica Roth for betraying her fanbase.) What makes me giddy is paper. I think you love it too. Don't hide it. Embrace it. Have you reached 5k words in a day? Go out and grab new materials for your writing wantiez and needz. It's okay if you buy another pack of colored pens even though your drawer is stuffed full of them from years of gathering.
I am the Squirrel of Pens. Hear me squeak.
Squeaker squeak squeaken.
2. Staycation
Yesterday I thought this was a great idea. The sun shined, I was done writing by 1000, I got my workout done by 1200, and all I wanted to do was try, and grab those rays with Vitamin D before another rain cloud hit.
(Hawaii in fall is all rain and wind or solid overcast. It's been rare to see the sun for longer than half a day. Like right now...it's pouring out. It could be all sun northshore, but I don't know. Never trust Hawaii weather. It's the mistress of deception. lol...anyway.)
I took the rest of my day as a sign to unwind. I fed my child and I and, while he played, I lounged in the backyard, and read. Personal development and Vitamin D. Spf 8 so I can stay out longer and I got to live in another writer's world for hours. I sharpened my most important writing tool and got great nutritional value out of the elusive sun. Win-Win (that's Franklin Covey, btw.).
Take the time to enjoy your home. You don't have to read. Maybe you're sick of reading and just want to play video games. That's cool too. But stay on schedule. Don't tune out the world for too long or you'll wonder what happened to the years of your life.
3. Venture Out
Got family? Take them with you. Go to the beach, a bounce house, or a park. Is it raining? Good. Splash in the puddles. Be a kid again. Enjoy life. Enjoy the oxygen. This one isn't about going to the movies or staying indoors. If you're writing a book that involves the environment, get in the environment! Remember the smells and the feels. Remember what triggers certain thoughts. Don't write it down! This is to live in the moment with yourself or with kids or with your lover. I got a friend who just took her Honeymoon over to Kauai. She's venturing out to Haleakala Crater, and hiking the Na Pali coast, and she just took a helo to see the stuff her feet will miss. A gorgeous place to be (another place where you cannot trust the weather). You can even play a game. Become one of your characters and respond to the world as they would. Did they take a lunch break? What did they order? Have they even seen this century before? That should be even funner. Oh yes. I said funner.
Enjoying the Outdoors now?
4. Exploit Capitalism
You knew this was coming. I don't like to shop unless I know what I'm looking for and then my mind goes into different trails of importance and I remember things I needed to get, so I end up shopping longer. But this is where I need you to focus. I'll try to focus too. FOCUS! Okay. Buy ONE thing that is a luxury item that does not count towards your writing. It can have writing inspiration stuff on it, if you want. But I want you to steer away from buying binders or paper. Omit tools or personal development. Got it? Make it count!
Shoes
Clothes
Jewelry
Accessories
Cosmetics (oh you know this includes nail polish! Eeeee!)
Lotion or other Hygiene Luxury Products
Candles
Phone case
Framed Print
Video Game
DVD/Blu-Ray/3D
Recreational Item
What did I miss? Most of these shouldn't blow a budget if you have one. Just count it under luxury (Dave Ramsey can help you, here, or I can give you a quick rundown--message me) and enjoy the purchase. No buyer's remorse, please. One item. Keep it simple. Cash or Debit. And know that it was purchased from your hard work!
5. Hire Loved One as Servant for the Day
You have told them you're doing NaNoWriMo. You told them it's going to be hard and they should forgive you for any snappy comebacks or lashing-outs you might make. You have done well. Very well. So well in fact you can ask them to pamper you. Do so respectively. You're not a queen or king, but if you say "hey, may I take a break for the day, and you help me relax?" I guarantee they will do their best to make this happen. If not, reconsider who your loved ones are. Unless they're sick or just got off work from 24-hour duty, request it. My husband tells me every day he's super proud of me for doing this. He watches me type insane amounts of words. Insane in my book is over 2,000, because life as a mom does not usually let me write that much in a day. Yet I am performing mommy writer miracles. I ask him to take care of the chores for the day and he has no problem.
If you can find a day for your loved one to do this for you, so you don't have to stress about the house being a mess, or you being a total dirt bag and not bathing for two days (accused and guilty), make it happen. Have them run you a bath. While you're soaking, they'll do the dishes, or make dinner. If you're a working family, do this over the weekend. If they must treasure their days off, then just have them do a chore or two that you would usually do. We're a military family so all off-days are precious. But my hubby can deal with cleaning the kitchen so it's not dragging through my mind when I also need that precious off-time.
NaNoWriMo?
Good heavens, Master Wayne.
I do think you're in over your head.
After you're done with NaNo, maybe you can pamper them back. It's a balanced relationship. It's supposed to be anyway. Both of you serve each other. Both of you love each other. Let them show you. And you show them.
Don't pamper me, sir.
= = = = = = = = = = = =
Avoid the junk food. It hinders your production and leaves your body feeling icky. It might release those endorphins for a time, but you'll be hurting.
You are worth being healthy. You are worth taking care of yourself. Don't let yourself or anyone else tell you different. Find the healthy rewards. You'll look back on it later and be thankful you did.
One last thing: don't reward yourself for every little thing.
Make a challenging goal, set it, and when you reach it, choose your reward. Is it to break your word count of the day from 2,000 to 5,000? Or maybe 750 to 1,500? Is it to reach the NaNoWriMo badges, like 10k or 25k? Make the goal short-term and when the long-term goal is achieved, it's a whole new sense of accomplishment that may be a reward in itself.
I know when I finished my first novel, I was on top of the world, and was so excited about the second, that I just ran right into outlining the second.
My rewards for finishing the overall goal were: (1) calling my parents late night, waking them up, and regaling them about my hard work; (2) posting photos of the final word count (120k+) and a happy selfie to smear in any haters' faces that were stalking me; and (3) cuddling with my son, knowing I just achieved one of my lifelong dreams, and just basking in the afterglow of hard work, determination, and consistency.
You can do this. If my once-procrastinating butt can do it, you can too.
14 October held the first webinar for NaNoWriMo. These authors have amazing insight into different ways of dealing with their books, managing time, and getting unstuck in their writing. Everybody has different ways of writing. Watch this and find yours.
Just don't listen to the authors when they're talking about snacks. You want your brain to be focused on healthy eating.
FOCUS!
(click on the words, not the image. I'm not HTML savvy enough to make it an easy click.)
Write What You Know. I hear many people say this. I also hear many people against prologues yet I've read Clive Cussler and he seems to be doing just fine. Do you really want to be like most people? Most people can be awfully...sheep-like.
Instead, try this:
The challenge is learning something new, or refreshing something you have knowledge of. Maybe you like historical fiction. You write historical fiction. A reliable source (Mom) knew of an author who spent years studying her subject. She'd get into the language, the clothes, the "current" events they would read in the newspaper, and all the details just to write her book as accurately as possible. She'd travel to the location of her setting. She'd take tours, she'd go to the universities and ask for information.
Write what you WANT to know.
People live in this bubble and their knowledge only goes out so far. But I believe humans naturally crave information. They're curious. They have to know things. Anybody or anything that gets in the way of that disrupts what it means to be human. But anything in the way of it knows that it cannot be stopped, even if threats of death breathe into their face. And the more you suppress a human, the more they rebel. The more they think. Why don't you want a human to be curious, they'll think.
Curiosity is a circle. A hungry circle that needs to be fed. Get out of that bubble once in a while and learn.
Want to write about Italian mobsters but live in Britain but can't leave your floral interior-designed loft that smells like your nan? Do it. Go learn. Incorporate your living quarters with your mobster book. Fuse the info that you know and the info you're studying to know.
I'm from the Northwest. I want Russians in my book. I'm studying Russian history (I took it in college and still want more), have books by Russian authors, and books on the language (one for slang, the other for...other). When I heard my pastor lived there and still keeps in contact with his translator, I knew I had to put him in my network. Not only do you need books, you need people. If you want to know more, you have to play nice. I smile and joke a lot. My military-disciplined personality goes a long way.
But if I wrote what I knew...I'd be living a life that I knew years ago that I do not want to go back to. At least right now. Maybe I'll write what I know later.
But as a veteran, I want to escape what I know. I want to write what I don't know. And that makes it fun. Any time I can escape reality, create my own worlds, and dive into them, I'm there. I don't even think writers know what will come out of the world they make. Characters from fantasy just seem to...pop out of nowhere and tell you this is how it's going to be.
Isn't that right, Caelum?
Caelum and Svetlana - "The First" - Monsters & Mercies
Write what you want to know.
You'll grow because you chose to get out of yourself.
Since military life plays a big part in my survival as a writer, I'm sharing my experiences. All photos are taken by me and are a part of the DDG-60 crew and their families. Respect these photos and do not take them for your own purposes.
Being a Navy veteran doesn't make deployment easier, it makes it more understandable. I've only done three deployments but they were all on CVN-72 aka Stinkin' Lincoln. 5,000 sailors on a floating city takes its toll. My shippies and I believed it ran on despair. The more miserable we were, the better the ship ran. The more happy, we'd lose reactor power. (True story: a fellow cook shared a joke and we all laughed. Seconds later, the galley went dark. One of the reactors went out. So you're damned right we're convinced.)
Now that I'm married and we have an awesome kid, I'm on the other side. I stay at home while my husband plays Navy. He just finished his first deployment as a father--fourth, overall. I don't know how parents do it if they're active or sea duty. That's nuts to be gone that long and away from your kids. Especially for the moms. It's heartbreaking. It takes more than understanding deployment or the military, it takes miles long of perseverance, and strength beyond Wonder Woman's (or Superman's). So I can understand (now) why some females would just snap during deployment. They're not in their element. They're going against every particle of their womanhood; it's biologically unsound to be apart from their children. When their biology is disrupted, everything else is out of whack. It's why I left the Navy. No more turning me inside-out for the good of the world.
There are those who have no choice. Or they choose to stay in because they can handle it. Those are some women. The more the struggle, the more armor they wear. They are genuine heroes. I applaud them.
For those such as myself, who had the choice and chose to be the support team, this is for you.
Master Chief Villanueva with his family.
These are some of the things that got me through deployment. I have very little friends. Some of them barely meet five feet. In seriousness, I prefer staying home in my nest and being with my kid. But there are times when I need to do more than laze about. I need to keep my sanity. How do I survive my husband being deployed? While you're waiting around for homecoming to happen, why not make it come to you faster by getting active?
We're waiting...and waiting...
Exercise
Healthy Eating
Being a Veteran
Put Your Diplomat Dungarees On
Make Sunday Family Day
Get Involved
Pursue Your Hobbies
(1) EXERCISE. Being a Beachbody coach and trying to stay consistent with my fitness groups helped. I'm not a fit guru, or a bodybuilding personal trainer, but I did lose a lot of weight, and never wanted to go back to that old, icky-feeling me. I know what it feels like not working out. I hate it. So I stayed with the fitness.
I involved myself in Stroller Warriors, a running club for military families. They accept anyone to join but it's easier if you have base access as the meet-ups are usually on base. Check your city if you have one. They do Couch to 5k, which is beginner level running. And 5ks and marathons are totally optional. I joined because it's a place for my kid to have a social outing. He gets to play at parks after we run. He's a great coach too. Hahaha. "Ready to go run? Okay! Let's go! Hurry up, Mom!"
No joke. It's a good way to be a good model. My kid also likes working out with me sometimes, especially if it's P90X-3. He loves Tony.
(2) HEALTHY EATING. I get crabby and tired if I carb load. Your body knows if it's not receiving the proper nutrients it needs; your brain will feel it. You might get "edgier" with others, more emotional. Don't forget to eat Vitamin B! Broccoli was the winning vegetable for me. Yep. That rhymed.
Want help eating healthy? Get a hold of me and don't let go. No, really. Don't. I love hugs.
(3) BEING A VETERAN. A weird one. An obvious one. But this helped immensely. Understanding the other side. Knowing exactly what's going to happen on that communist floating prison--I mean--ship. If my husband didn't call for a week, I noticed, but I knew why. I remember everything. I mean...EVERYTHING from my deployments. There would be times I wouldn't call my parents for a month. I worked 18-hour days. I would be happy with my hubby if he told me "can't talk, I got off work early so I'm going straight to bed for a good six hours." Six hours? Hot dog! That's a lot of sleep! You go, dude! Sleep away!
(4) PUT YOUR DIPLOMAT DUNGAREES ON. Be a diplomatic wife with his chain of command. Before my husband's ship pulled out, I handed off a gift bag to my husband the morning of, and told him to deliver it to his senior chief. It contained a letter letting Senior know that I love my husband, he's a very good worker (we used to work together, so I know), and that I am watching you. In a nice way. With that letter was a bag of homemade cookies. Nothing better than homecooking to the military.
If you think you're kissing tail, you're not. You're putting a positive spotlight on your spouse and giving him an attentive barrier. A barrier, meaning, the command will be more lenient if he messes up (he will mess up; everybody does), and they'll take special note that he has a family who's watching out for him, and that'll boost the possibility of getting more opportunities. My husband was going up for first (E-6) and was having a difficult time with the test part. He got awards for good performance at work 'n' stuff. I think that helped. At least...I hope my diplomacy helped with some of that. Keep in mind that everyone on that ship will be under stress and they will forget about those cookies and letters you send. It happens. In the end, it doesn't matter. They'll kick themselves for saying things that shouldn't've been said. Cuz when you see them, you'll thank them for being nice to your spouse (even if they weren't). And you'll thank them for keeping an eye out on your spouse (even if they didn't). You're the diplomat. You're the face of the family. Be civil. It calms the storm on the ship during deployment and the storm at home. It really does help.
(5) MAKE SUNDAY FAMILY DAY. Do it. Pay attention to your kids. My father said Sunday was his favorite day when he was young cuz every night was pajamas, cocoa, and TV. His mom did laundry only on Sundays and cocoa was dinner because they didn't have a lot of money back then. But those were his best times. Make memories with your kids. They love you. If Sunday doesn't work, figure out another day. Schedule the whole week for different things if you want. It's up to you.
You could even go on an extended vacation to see family. That's what I did to kill a few months.
(6) GET INVOLVED. Go on Facebook, find the ship's Ombudsman. He or she will have a page you can follow. They'll ask for some information and then you'll get to know what's going on with the ship. A huge load off your shoulders instead of waiting around for your spouse to tell you, if they know anything at all.
Also, join the ship's Fleet Readiness Group page. You don't have to be a part of the group, but joining the page will give you updates as well as events to show up to. There are parties, meetings, and community work. Knowing exactly what goes on during deployment is what kept me from going full Dependa on people, or just a total jack-monkey. Plus you get to meet people dealing with the same issues you are.
It's a great networking opportunity if you're a photographer, artist, salon specialist, etc.. No shame giving them your business card even if it is just a hobby. You'll connect, meet friends, and time will pass by if you have events scheduled, like helping with homecoming.
Fence cup display event for our ship.
(7) PURSUE YOUR HOBBIES. I had lots of hobbies and care packages to keep me busy. Focus on them!
Practice photography so when homecoming comes around, you'll be better at taking different types of shots.
Do your nails, so when you feel good enough, you can give other military spouses a free manicure. Get some nail stamp plates that nail salons charge lots for a girl just wanting to look pretty. Make it a nail party! Have someone buy the wine if they insist on paying you for a mani-pedi.
Take up painting. Use your garage or maybe go some place peaceful with your canvas and easel. Maybe you like digital painting. Ask your spouse if it's okay to buy Photoshop and a tablet. Artistic route is always good because you can make things for others...including your spouse for a care package or homecoming.
Or if you're a writer (and you are if you've been following my blog), get to work! Is it a novel? Get that outline finished so you can dive into the story. Is your kid hindering you? Get up earlier. You're gonna have to make time if you really want that first draft done.
Become my writing buddy if you think this November event is a good distraction.
It's a social event that can really help you push your first draft along. My first book's 50,000 words without NaNoWriMo took me half a year, when I was actually focusing on writing. This year I plan on using NaNoWriMo as a fantastic excuse to push through the 50,000 in the 30 days given. 50k, for my first book, was a little over half my first draft. This is doable!
* * * * *
Before you know it, your sailor will be home.
It takes a lot of patience, planning, and coming up with distractions for you and your kids. Include them in your hobbies. I taught my child how to use my camera. He's a careful type for four years old. We also drew and painted a lot.
When homecoming was a month out, I started contacting family members, friends, and celebrities to send me a short, welcome-home video. I put all the vids together and my son and I added our own flavor.
This is it:
Something you like? Dislike? Is there something you would add? Leave a comment! Don't be shy.
Apologies if my posts for this week and next seem distracted. I have good reason: my husband returned from deployment! Yay! We've missed him fiercely, especially our little monster. Happy to be under the same roof again.
We're Whole Again
As a military family, we are bombarded with obstacles. We signed up to serve our country (yes, I served for a while, but got out when we had our son) and face conflict only 1% of this nation will ever experience. Those conflicts are why I love fantasy genres. Anything to escape our reality is the best story, as long as it is, really, the best. I want a book that entertains and steers my mind from current events, the real world. I want conflict that I won't deal with if I was at sea or at home. I want an escape.
But I also want to relate to the characters. Conflict with unappealing characters means I close that book, either putting it down, or throwing it across the room. Maybe I won't even touch it at all...(cough) Twilight.
I mean no one is going to care about my husband working in the Navy if they don't understand why he puts up with the deployments all the time. There's conflict and then there's character. It's characters that drive the story. Conflict only propels them to reveal who they really are.
One reason I started writing is because I got sick of people eating up these awful books that have the weakest female characters in the world. They're not role models and they sicken me. They get published and I can see why: the conflict is believable in its genre, but the characters are lacking for some reason. Maybe it's just me, but I don't find boring personalities entertaining. They're...boring. Or annoying. This usually happens when their motivations are lackadaisy.
So how do you get out of that rut? I have some characters that I debate on allowing their existence. But I set them aside because I know they're not ready to tell me who they really are. Or I have characters that I never knew existed and there they are. My prot goes into another world and I'm just as surprised as she is to find out all the different people that live there. And it works for me. If I'm not intrigued, the reader isn't intrigued. It's a journey I love to go on despite my need-for-control quirks. Because if the story isn't driven by the characters you know and not know, then the story isn't believable. The conflict is there but the characters are who go through the conflicts. If you force them to go through the motions to solve situations, readers will know.
I can go into great detail on creating characters that aren't boring but that's very basic and I think new writers have more potential for nailing this part than they do balancing out conflict with character. So let's focus on the balance.
What is CONFLICT? Anything that hinders your character to satisfy her desires. Much different from a delay or incident, like a gun just out of reach when a victim falls while the attacker is closing in. The conflict is the attacker, not the delay, which is the gun inches from fingers.
Conflict will exist when your character has a goal. Make this goal clear to your reader.
For example: (Goal) Svetlana wants to be her own person. (Conflict) Her father, Ruslan, forces her to join the military.
The conflict will elevate when both try their hardest to achieve their goals. What makes this more dynamic is understanding the inner conflict that goes with the external. Sveta's external is her dad, and her internal would be her rebellious nature, or maybe her insecurity to stand up to him.
And goals will change because the person changes. And that's fine. What is important is that the reader must care about the character before the conflict matters. Most readers are character-driven. Humans are social creatures and naturally seek connections with others. If they don't care, they won't read. The conflict will bring the story to life by the character's motivation to reach their goals, and the reactions brought on by the conflict. Your story's core is emotion. Why is the character pushing through to the end? Why should we care? Answer these for yourself. Ensure your story has characters we'll care about.
In the book Writing with Emotion, Tension, & Conflict, Cheryl St.John writes this principle: "What the character is doing is not as important as why he is doing it. What's happening is not as important as how he reacts to what's happening."
I highly recommend this book to study her take on conflict, although I disagree with her when she says that being angry and bickering "is acceptable for antagonists because it characterizes them, but your protagonists must have more depth." She talks about conflict not being the foot-stomping moments. What I disagree with is prots being more in depth than antagonists. The ant and the prot should be equally-motivated, if not more.
Antagonists are the ones with the most depth, I have read. They are the characters I love because they have relatable reasons to do what they do. You see? It's character-driven, not conflict. When the story has two characters with believable motivation to achieve their goals no matter what conflict, it makes for a more compelling read. When you adamantly know every character's motivations, you will soar through your writing. And St.John also explains this. And I agree with her. But let that antagonist shine.
Find some writing exercises to help develop your conflict and understand your character's motivations. Choose your protagonist, and come up with one sentence to describe their goal. Is their goal based on the conflict or is it based on personal desires? Will their goal change throughout the story or remain the same?
Do the same for your antagonist. Are they the conflict to the protagonist or is it something else? Will their goal change?
How might each character's inner conflict fight their external conflict? Will they think one way and act another?
Have fun this weekend! I'll be spending quality time with my sailor and catching up on some personal development. Later kiddos.
One of the funnest things I get to do as a writer and artist is submerge myself in the characters. Often, I walk around the house responding to common chores as they would, and see where it leads. While I'm doing the dishes, I'm talking out a scene. Showering, singing their theme songs, or imagining their scene according to whatever instrumental I've chosen. And this is me taking a break from writing.
The brain never stops. Curse, meet habeñero-chocolate-coated Blessing.
What do you do when you've exhausted your writing? Or you've tripped over a character block? Because you're not understanding the character enough, your story doesn't seem dynamic enough, maybe even believable. Maybe it's boring. Whatever the reason, you tired of the work; so do your characters. Time to take them out for some casual entertainment.
Yes. A date.
Pick Your Person
Pick Your Place
Pick Your Picture
Go to Town (or park, or studio, or...)
Archive it
Pick Your Person
Pick one you don't know very well. Maybe pick one you really enjoy (yep...exactly like a date). Is it a double date? A group? Just you plus one? You're dating to get to know them and let off steam. Make it count, especially if they like you. My antagonists usually say so, but then they don't call for a week, and I'm forced to torture them with the protagonist's success. That's what they get.
Pick Your Place
Set the setting. Set the mood. Set the table. Your table, actually. Or lap. What's your medium? You're not limited but since I can draw, we'll focus on that.
What are you doing with your character? Concert? Ballroom? Deli? One of my characters happens to really like sandwiches.
Pick Your Picture
If you haven't figured it out, the whole date thing is just getting you to pull out that sketchbook, and think about your character outside the story. Take my two protagonists (prots), Sven and Darlana. These scenes are nowhere in the book, but I wanted to see what these two would do between the chapters. Darlana's drunk face, the serious catwalk strut from an explosion (maybe) straight to lunch--all of this helps the writer see what kind of friendship the prots would have outside the plot. Think of your antagonists (antas). What would they do?
Some of my sketches never become line art or colored. I just keep them for the sake of enjoying the character. Seeing them with other characters, seeing them with me, makes writing so much easier. You're building a relationship with them. The more you love them, the more you want to write, and write well. And some others might benefit from the sketch as reference for their own work. I like to share as long as people don't steal.
Go to Town
Have a blast!
There are many ways to date your character. You can even try and be them. Take my expression reference for Sven:
Charismatic character? You'll want to keep references like this on a wall somewhere as a cheat sheet to know what tone and personality boundaries you can't cross. You want to be consistent in your writing. And knowing what your characters do in their spare time, deepens your knowledge about them.
Sven isn't the dull type. His dialogue doesn't show it, his face doesn't show it. You might even hear his accent through these expressions alone. He is one of my favorites. (Bradley Cooper is his lookalike, by-d-by.)
Archive It
Keep your sketches handy! Use them as you will. Find other people's references and, if they say it's okay, work off theirs. I have my own art website you can go to see these drawings. Always keep your sketches. I have a folder that's like a scrapbook. But some of these sketches are on my wall to keep them fresh in my mind.
Hope this gives you some idea of lightening the writing mood when you're not writing. If you're on DeviantArt also, +watch me and I'll watch back. Later kiddos!
I struggle every day to motivate myself out of bed, turn on the Keurig, and sit in one spot and write until my four-year-old wakes up. His waking occurrence can happen five minutes after I start typing, or four hours later, when I kick myself for not making lunch. I am in no way an expert, but I found, throughout my years of writing, a few life hacks to get you going:
Minimalize Your Workspace
Find Your Habits
Psyche Yourself Up
Personal Development
Eat Simple
Focus on your Triforce
#1 Minimalize Your Workspace
Not minimize. Minimalize. Some photographers have a style called minimalism, where less is more in their shots. You must be free of distractions. Your work space is your sanctuary for your characters and you must treat them with respect. You are torturing them with plot and could possibly kill one of them. Being respectful is the least you can do.
Consider your space like a date scene. You have a date with your book and all the characters want your attention. You don't talk to them while you're playing a game on your phone, or have sidebar with someone else in the room. You just don't. Unless you're talking to yourself (which could be #2 or #3 on the list) you can't afford wasting your characters' time. You have a world to suck people into. Simplify your holy ground and get to work. You have torture to do.
#2 Find Your Habits
All writers have them. You don't have to copy them, maybe you just want to try them out, but you need to find you. You find you by figuring out your quirks, your weaknesses, your strengths, and your style. This comes with every day practice. Some writers couldn't write unless they were naked, or not wearing pants. Some had to be outside, some had to be hiding in a loft.
I have to wear a beanie.
Said beanie.
I caught myself playing with my hair with one hand on the keyboard, not doing anything but re-reading my work, or staring blankly at the screen. I put a beanie on my head one day and both hands got busy typing. The distraction was gone. My habit was curbed. Now I don't wear a beanie all the time...but it helps when I have a very hard time focusing.
#3 Psyche Yourself Up
What's your style? What helps you get your muse in gear? There are different learning styles for people just as there are inspiration styles.
Consider creating a playlist for your book. You're in the shower and you play songs that get your imagination going.
(Confession: I do this all the time, even sing out loud, and pretend the characters are right there in front of me [clothed and dry, mind you...sometimes], either singing along, or acting out a scene. It helps me organize my story, especially if I'm struggling with moving the plot along.)
I also have playlists for each major character and mood lists, depending on what mood I need to get into to write specific scenes. I have battle sequences, death, love, sex, nostalgic, etc.. I read somewhere that Audiosparx is where filmmakers go to nail the perfect track for their trailers or movie scenes.
Some inspirational music I have is from Two Steps From Hell and more well known composers like Hans Zimmer. I collect soundtracks so I can't list them all, but Two Steps From Hell is a great starting point. "Archangel" will always be my favorite when I need to get into the action scene mood.
I did mention weaknesses in #2. Your weakness can be your undoing; you can overcome it if you know what it is. Mine is perfectionism. I overcome this by whole-heartedly knowing people must read my story. They will love my characters as I do and they will love the world I pulled them into. If I don't write, I lose my mind. This is my passion. And no dark whispers in my head saying I should just give up because I will fail can stop me.
Psyche yourself up by looking through Pinterest and finding motivational quotes from authors. Make your own board of all these (mine is called "Brie's Self-Motivation Vocation") and read them. Guaranteed one of them will spark something in you.
If you're still struggling, I would print out pictures that motivate you, or draw pictures of your characters. Draw your own fan art. As an artist, this is fun to do when I'm not writing. I draw them out of character as well. You gotta lighten up sometimes. Torture miserable characters with happiness. You might just kill them outside your story. Mwahahaha.
#4 Personal Development
Reading about writing for at least fifteen minutes will sharpen your writing skills, especially if you do this at least once a day. So take that fifteen and read a writing book. K.M Weiland and Angela Ackerman have great books on Amazon. A good writer always has learning tools in their arsenal. Buy a couple. If you're pressed on money, buy the one book that you would really benefit from. Mine was "How to Write a Novel in 90 Days" to get through my first book. I didn't make it in 90 days but I made it further than I ever would have. And I finished, so that says something.
You'll hear from dozens of people how they want to write a novel someday. Maybe you're one of them. Be that person who actually commits. Don't wait around for something tragic to happen in your life to get you started (yes...like I did. More on that another time.).
#5 Eat Simple
I don't mean go out to a fast food joint and overload on calories (that'll lead you to a carb coma), Stay in the house, fix something quick, eat it, then get to writing. I will post another blog on fast nutrition that's healthy and helps your brain focus. For this, I will say avoid making omelettes or other time-consuming products. Being a Beachbody coach, I have tricks to help you stay on track without slaving away in the kitchen.
In the morning, I usually make Shakeology, but if I don't want to make a lot of noise, I make a cup of greek yogurt and granola, or cottage cheese and berries. It takes less than five minutes to prepare and my brain will thank me for fueling it something besides black coffee.
#6 Focus on Your Triforce
Mind, Body, Soul.
Your soul is the writing but your mind is conflicted, your body is tired, and your soul has temporarily lost its passion.
Your body craves something physical or nutritional. If it doesn't get exercise or proper food, your mind loses focus, and your soul is left to wait, buried in a weak body.
Your mind is not learning; it's bored and all those perishable skills are waning. Your body is sluggish and your soul cannot be happy with a distracted, lazy brain.
Your soul is not being fed things that make it happy. You're not relaxing and are worried about work, school, or fitness. Life is getting in the way of actual life: your purpose.
This is the balance of life. We have to find a way to keep our Triforce in check because if one piece fails, they all fall apart.
Personal Development helps with mind issues, but so does going to Bible Study, or meditating, or avoiding family drama. Learning something new every day makes your wit sharper and your curiosity satiated. Watch the mental stress levels.
If work is straining you, try soothing your soul with a hobby, which may help destress you. If my husband comes home from work (yes, I said if. It's a military thing.), he'll either watch TV, or play video games. He doesn't want to deal with physical stress, like playing with our kid. He may try, but Tag is out of the question.
After I clean the house and run errands, I like to write, draw, or game. I also have a habit of running out of the house before sunset with my camera gear, and practice shooting. If you don't believe me, I have a Flickr account here. And this is one of my shots (it is available for print):
For balancing the body, I cannot stress exercise enough. I used to be very overweight and was miserable. There was no sense in pursuing my dreams because I didn't like myself enough to do anything. I was a horrible role model for my son and I am glad that chapter in my life is done. But it is never closed. I want people to know my struggles so they don't feel alone. While I started my first book, I also got into P90X. Everything started falling into place when I took care of myself. Thus, the Triforce revelation.
Leave a comment or question! Let me know how I have helped you or confused you. :D
If you're interested in healthy living, find me on Facebook at Facebook.com/tomacrux. I'm happy to answer any questions you have. Or if you have a body transformation story, I'd love to hear it! Always excited to meet new people!
